


Vulnerable

by hazzard



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, cute angst, i guess??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-06 02:25:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11026644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazzard/pseuds/hazzard
Summary: Philinda cuddling. That's it, basically.(...and a little angst cuz im horrible whoops)





	Vulnerable

It wasn’t that she regretted doing it. After everything that had happened, after all the scares and all the time spent apart, they both needed it. She had needed it. She still did.

So she didn’t regret it.

But, as with everything with them, it was complicated. And it was difficult having him so close without revealing everything.

It had all begun after he’d nervously asked her to stay after they’d spent a night in his room, drinking scotch and trying to make sense of the world again. His question had made her freeze, not being sure what exactly his words entailed. He’d swallowed, hard, and said “I’m just… You were gone so long and I’m scared I’ll lose you again and…” He’d let out a chuckle, his cheeks slightly reddening. “Never mind. It’s stupid.”

She hadn’t thought so.  At all. Her heart had been beating like crazy.

She’d searched for his fleeting eyes. When she’d gotten them, she’d nodded. _Of course she’d stay._

And she had.

Every night for the past week. 

 

They’d ended up in each others arms that first night. She’d woken up with his chest to her back and his arms tightly around her. It’d felt too right and she’d been terrified. But she’d kept coming back, every night, and she’d kept waking up with his body close to hers, every morning. She loved it, she needed it, and that terrified her. But not enough to make her stop. She’d let the vulnerability win over the fear.

Until now.

The base was calming down, becoming silent. She sat in the kitchen, huddled in a corner, and drank tea. She thought about him in his room and wondered if he’d already changed into the old S.H.I.E.L.D. academy t-shirt he always slept in. She thought about how it felt waking up with him and wondered if she should stop before she’d get her heart broken.

She hadn’t gone over to his room yesterday.

She wondered if that had been a good move and the cup felt warm in her hands.

All of a sudden, she heard steps coming towards her. She looked up and it was _him._ He was still wearing his suit and he looked exhausted but _oh, so beautiful,_ and her breath caught in her throat.

He stopped when he saw her. He hesitated a second or two before he started coming against her. 

He gestured to the ground beside her. “Can I…?” She nodded and he sat down.

They sat silently for a while, her drinking her tea and him nervously fidgeting with his hands. Then, he looked up. He cleared his throat. “First of all, I’m aware I really have no right asking you this or putting pressure on you or forcing you into anything, and please know that that is not my intention, I will of course respect your space and your decision without any sort of resentment or expectations and I-”

She raised her eyebrows and faintly rolled her eyes. He got the hint and cut himself of, giving her an apologetic smile. “I know. _Rambling_.” He was so cute. _Fuck._

“You didn’t… come by yesterday.” She tensed up, breaking their eye-contact. She took another sip of her tea and he continued. “I understand if you want to stop, if you want it to stop and go back to-” He nonchalantly scratched his neck and tried to hide how shaky his voice had sounded. “I don’t want it to stop.”

She looked at him. He looked a little panicked, but completely sincere. Her heart filled with the possibilities and she desperately tried to lock them away.

He kept going, sounding more and more desperate with every word. “I don’t want it to stop, I don’t want you to stop coming to me and I don’t want to stop waking up together and-” He stopped and her whole body felt weak. _Please, please, please…_

He looked at her and his eyes made her want to grab him and never let go.

“I don’t want you to stop.”

His voice was making her heart bleed and man, man, _man,_ he had so much power over her, she’d do anything for him, anything, anything…

“If you want to stop I understand, I’ll let you go and-”

She put a hand on his arm. “I’m not stopping.”

He smiled and the relief was clear in his eyes. “Oh. Good, then.”

She couldn’t help but smile back. _What a dork._

“So, do you want to…” 

She quickly shook her head. “Not yet. Let’s just stay here for a while.”

He nodded. “Ok.”

She put the cup on the floor and scooped closer. When his arms settled around her waist, she laid her head on his chest and breathed in his scent. She listened to his calm heartbeat and let herself be completely vulnerable.

**Author's Note:**

> I was prompted (razzledazzlewaffle on tumblr.com)
> 
> hope you like it!
> 
> ((I like you and comments/kudos))
> 
> hugs hugs hugs and philinda feels!


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